I know you all love Emo aka "Vince Young" lovers have been checking out the site, but I honestly just came for A) praise that I will never receive and B) AN UPDATE...
A) You know you forwarded on this website to all of your friends when you read the post that Vince Young was a crazy ass...but you have yet to realize how awesome it is to break a story before ESPN...
It basically feels like blaring a porno from your Escalade truck with the windows down...I FEEL LIKE A WINNER BOBBY!
B) Vince Young's mom is upset and my god is she a vocal woman, following quotes were included:
- " Pray for my baby boy"
- "What would you think, if you were tired of being ridiculed and persecuted."
- "Talked about (by fans) and not being treated very well,"
- "what would you do?
- "What kind of decision would you make?"
- "He may not want to deal with it ..."
- "we're not talking about football right now. We're talking about what would make him happy"
Sounds like some pretty intense quotes from his mom, who I'm assuming is pretty close with VY considering she "cleansed him" during troubled times before.
I feel really good about my judgement of where Vince Young's head is right now...
He will either come back and be Johnny bad ass (like he did when Mack Brown questioned his dedication and benched him for a half) and never lose another game...like he did in college...
OR he will NEVER start again. Which would put him in the branch of the worst bust in NFL history...
Interesting stuff...ok, I have a beautiful girl on my arm right now and I really need to go.....just thought you would like to know my dedication to this blog...
Have a great night Colston owners...
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
EMO WATCH - VINCE YOUNG
Yesterday I wrote about how Vince Young is a loser and has no back bone. Apparently it got to him because he was an emotional wreck last night.
According to reports (via WKRN news in Nashville), Vince left his house around 7:30 last night and left his phone at his apartment because he wanted to be alone. Which in turn pushed Jeff Fischer out on a wild goose around Nashville trying to find his young QB.
The whole thing wrapped up after a 12:30 AM meeting at the stadium between Fischer and Young. Fischer described the whole thing as a
"misunderstanding" and said Vince was fine.
There is some SHADY stuff going on in
Tennessee following the Titans fans booing him after his second interception of the day.I almost question whether Vince Young's injury is even legit. Maybe the Titans are giving him 2-4 weeks off for mental health rather than physical health. This kid is so emotional, I wouldn't be surprised if this whole story is really a suicide attempt being covered up.
It also makes you wonder if his career as we know it is basically over. Who knows if this guy is going to have the desire to play again.
I'll keep you updated...on the status of Vince Young being an emotional, unstable loser.
The Pile Up: Big Injuries from Week One
The first week is always the most painful, every football player knows that. It's the first time you take a full speed hit, the first time you get those deep bone bruises that just won't go away for months at a time. It's part of football and everyone knows it.
However, this first week was particularly bad for a few teams...here's a run down of the big ones and the impact they are going to have on the teams:
Tom Brady - Out for Season with Left ACL Tear. Even though Brady is the best QB in the league, I think the Pats can still make the playoffs. Are they going to win the division? No. They are however a viable wild card team, barring a Randy Moss injury...then they would be screwed.
Nate Burleson - Out for Season with Right ACL Tear. Burleson is not a top ten receiver, that's pretty obvious, he was however incredibly important to this Seattle team. They now have their top three receivers all out until at least week 4 (Deion Branch and Bobby Engram are both out with leg injuries). Who are they going to turn to? Why, Courtney Taylor and Logan Pane of course! Oh yeah, and Maurice Morris is out for two weeks and Julius Jones is going to have to handle the load all by himself. It's exactly what he wanted, probably not what Seattle wanted.
Shawne Merriman - Trying to be a bad-ass with two knee tendon tears. No he didn't injure anything further, but the dude could only last two plays before he went to the locker room and called it a day. JUST GET SURGERY, YOU NUT JOB! Who in the hell thinks they can play against NFL caliber athletes with one good knee? Stop injecting the steroids into your head...it's affecting your decision making skills. Lock it up and call it a year, you're too talented and too young to risk your career over being Johnny Bad-Ass.
Vince Manuwai and Maurice Williams - ACL Tear and Right Bicep Tear. Who are these guys? They were the former starting left and right guard for the Jacksonville Jaguars until this past week knocked them out. This is a HUGE loss for such a run-heavy team. Maybe this is why the Jags could only muster 33 rushing yards on the Titans last week. I mean they were playing against a defense who's best player (Albert Haynesworth) admitted to not playing in the game at all due to a concussion. ( http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080907/SPORTS01/80907011/1027 ) This could have huge implications on Jones-Drew and Taylor all season long. Or they could just handle business as usual...who knows.
Willis McGahee - Still recovering from surgery on this knee...
I love showing that because it's the worst knee injury I've ever seen and it happened to OSU. Folks, I said this a couple of weeks ago...be wary of McGahee's knee injury, it's probably worse than advertised. Anytime you have surgery on a knee that the above video happened to, it's going to take longer than expected to return.
I know everyone is saying he is probable for next week...B.S. I say he's lost a step, he's not as strong, and he could get injured again, very easily. Ray Rice, here we come.
Marion Barber - Marion left the Cleveland game in the third quarter (I think) after a nasty shot to the ribs but will apparently be ok. How do we know? "Because Barbarian's don't get hurt," thanks Deon Anderson.
Hopefully this doesn't keep up...
However, this first week was particularly bad for a few teams...here's a run down of the big ones and the impact they are going to have on the teams:
Tom Brady - Out for Season with Left ACL Tear. Even though Brady is the best QB in the league, I think the Pats can still make the playoffs. Are they going to win the division? No. They are however a viable wild card team, barring a Randy Moss injury...then they would be screwed.
Nate Burleson - Out for Season with Right ACL Tear. Burleson is not a top ten receiver, that's pretty obvious, he was however incredibly important to this Seattle team. They now have their top three receivers all out until at least week 4 (Deion Branch and Bobby Engram are both out with leg injuries). Who are they going to turn to? Why, Courtney Taylor and Logan Pane of course! Oh yeah, and Maurice Morris is out for two weeks and Julius Jones is going to have to handle the load all by himself. It's exactly what he wanted, probably not what Seattle wanted.
Shawne Merriman - Trying to be a bad-ass with two knee tendon tears. No he didn't injure anything further, but the dude could only last two plays before he went to the locker room and called it a day. JUST GET SURGERY, YOU NUT JOB! Who in the hell thinks they can play against NFL caliber athletes with one good knee? Stop injecting the steroids into your head...it's affecting your decision making skills. Lock it up and call it a year, you're too talented and too young to risk your career over being Johnny Bad-Ass.
Vince Manuwai and Maurice Williams - ACL Tear and Right Bicep Tear. Who are these guys? They were the former starting left and right guard for the Jacksonville Jaguars until this past week knocked them out. This is a HUGE loss for such a run-heavy team. Maybe this is why the Jags could only muster 33 rushing yards on the Titans last week. I mean they were playing against a defense who's best player (Albert Haynesworth) admitted to not playing in the game at all due to a concussion. ( http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080907/SPORTS01/80907011/1027 ) This could have huge implications on Jones-Drew and Taylor all season long. Or they could just handle business as usual...who knows.
Willis McGahee - Still recovering from surgery on this knee...
I love showing that because it's the worst knee injury I've ever seen and it happened to OSU. Folks, I said this a couple of weeks ago...be wary of McGahee's knee injury, it's probably worse than advertised. Anytime you have surgery on a knee that the above video happened to, it's going to take longer than expected to return.
I know everyone is saying he is probable for next week...B.S. I say he's lost a step, he's not as strong, and he could get injured again, very easily. Ray Rice, here we come.
Marion Barber - Marion left the Cleveland game in the third quarter (I think) after a nasty shot to the ribs but will apparently be ok. How do we know? "Because Barbarian's don't get hurt," thanks Deon Anderson.
Hopefully this doesn't keep up...
Monday, September 8, 2008
Vince Young is a loser
It was kind of hard to believe but Vince Young looked like he quit on his team yesterday. After "tweaking his hamstring" on the same play he just happened to throw his second interception of the day, he walked over to the sideline and slammed his butt on the bench.
Fischer had no idea, but he didn't feel like going back in...
After the defense held JAX to a three and out, the team went on to the field and into the huddle without a QB. Fischer "bee-lined it" over to Young and seemed to have a little bit of an argument with him on the sideline and "basically threw him onto the field."
( http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080907/COLUMNIST0202/80907012/1027 )
Four plays later he partially tore his MCL on a bootleg and is out 2-4 weeks.
This is an incredibly interesting story considering the man almost retired after his 2006 Rookie of the Year campaign. ( http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080907/COLUMNIST0202/80907012/1027 )
He has some serious issues if the fans booing him after he throws an interception get under his skin to the point that he's going to give up. Grow the F up. You think it's bad in Tennessee? Come up to Philly and I'll show you how to make someone feel unappreciated.
We throw batteries at you on flashlight night ( http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/baseball/mlb/news/1999/08/10/cardinals_phillies_ap/ )
We throw snowballs at Santa
( http://www.usatoday.com/sports/football/nfl/eagles/2003-11-27-santa-snowballs_x.htm )
We boo the shit out of the best thing that's ever happened to our franchise.
We welcome back a player who took us to the Super Bowl with "O.D." chants after a near death experience
If you're going to pussy-foot it around like your mom yelled at you after you throw an interception, maybe you should retire...you freaking 12 year old.
You're an unbelievably talented athlete (not a talented QB) who despite throwing twice as many interceptions as touchdowns last year...STILL led his team to the playoffs. How you did that is beyond me, but it says something about your desire to win.
Pick your head up, be a role model and get the F on the field.
Fischer had no idea, but he didn't feel like going back in...
After the defense held JAX to a three and out, the team went on to the field and into the huddle without a QB. Fischer "bee-lined it" over to Young and seemed to have a little bit of an argument with him on the sideline and "basically threw him onto the field."
( http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080907/COLUMNIST0202/80907012/1027 )
Four plays later he partially tore his MCL on a bootleg and is out 2-4 weeks.
This is an incredibly interesting story considering the man almost retired after his 2006 Rookie of the Year campaign. ( http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080907/COLUMNIST0202/80907012/1027 )
He has some serious issues if the fans booing him after he throws an interception get under his skin to the point that he's going to give up. Grow the F up. You think it's bad in Tennessee? Come up to Philly and I'll show you how to make someone feel unappreciated.
We throw batteries at you on flashlight night ( http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/baseball/mlb/news/1999/08/10/cardinals_phillies_ap/ )
We throw snowballs at Santa
( http://www.usatoday.com/sports/football/nfl/eagles/2003-11-27-santa-snowballs_x.htm )
We boo the shit out of the best thing that's ever happened to our franchise.
We welcome back a player who took us to the Super Bowl with "O.D." chants after a near death experience
If you're going to pussy-foot it around like your mom yelled at you after you throw an interception, maybe you should retire...you freaking 12 year old.
You're an unbelievably talented athlete (not a talented QB) who despite throwing twice as many interceptions as touchdowns last year...STILL led his team to the playoffs. How you did that is beyond me, but it says something about your desire to win.
Pick your head up, be a role model and get the F on the field.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Brady is out for the season ACL
Per a personal source...aka a very public source since I have no clout
http://www.profootballtalk.com/2008/09/07/report-brady-out-for-the-year/
UPDATE: NFL.com reports Brady out for the season... http://blogs.nfl.com/category/news/
TOM BRADY IS OUT FOR THE SEASON with a torn left ACL tendon.
It happened on a 30 yard completion to Randy Moss...here's an incredibly lame slide show to let you know how it happened
This has HUGE implications, not only in the AFC East, but in fantasy sports fans everywhere.
To all of the people who drafted Randy Moss or Tom Brady in the first round: HAHA
Cardinal rule number one in my fantasy perspective - "Don't take anyone who has any injury concern in the first or second round...whether it be Tom Brady or LT...it's just not worth it."
Have fun with Sam Cassel, Brady owners
http://www.profootballtalk.com/2008/09/07/report-brady-out-for-the-year/
UPDATE: NFL.com reports Brady out for the season... http://blogs.nfl.com/category/news/
TOM BRADY IS OUT FOR THE SEASON with a torn left ACL tendon.
It happened on a 30 yard completion to Randy Moss...here's an incredibly lame slide show to let you know how it happened
This has HUGE implications, not only in the AFC East, but in fantasy sports fans everywhere.
To all of the people who drafted Randy Moss or Tom Brady in the first round: HAHA
Cardinal rule number one in my fantasy perspective - "Don't take anyone who has any injury concern in the first or second round...whether it be Tom Brady or LT...it's just not worth it."
Have fun with Sam Cassel, Brady owners
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Last One...Going to make it quick
I obviously need to get these done before the first Sunday of the season, but I truthfully don't feel like getting into a lot of detail, so here's the rundown.
No way that anyone is winning this division other than the New Orleans Saints. They are just too talented on offense. It should be fun to see how the acquisition of Jeremy Shockey effects the flow of their offense. If you ask me, Reggie Bush is going to be the biggest benefactor.
Bush has been somewhat of a disappointment in his short NFL career, averaging about 1,000 total yards and 7 TD's a year, pretty mediocre. A big reason for this is because defenses change their game plans to cater to the swing pass and the dumps he gets from Brees all the time. Well that all just changed. Shockey is going to force linebackers out of the shallow zone coverages, force safeties to be more wary of the middle which will simultaneously force the corner backs to focus on deep balls more as there help over the top is going to be busy jamming Shockey. All of these combined means that Bush is going to get another couple of yards to play with on all of those swing routes and dumps. Watch out for a much more productive season from Reggie...maybe he can buy Kim Kardashian a new set of heels with his bonus money he'll be making.
On top of that the Saints defense could not be much worse than last year.
No way that anyone is winning this division other than the New Orleans Saints. They are just too talented on offense. It should be fun to see how the acquisition of Jeremy Shockey effects the flow of their offense. If you ask me, Reggie Bush is going to be the biggest benefactor.
Bush has been somewhat of a disappointment in his short NFL career, averaging about 1,000 total yards and 7 TD's a year, pretty mediocre. A big reason for this is because defenses change their game plans to cater to the swing pass and the dumps he gets from Brees all the time. Well that all just changed. Shockey is going to force linebackers out of the shallow zone coverages, force safeties to be more wary of the middle which will simultaneously force the corner backs to focus on deep balls more as there help over the top is going to be busy jamming Shockey. All of these combined means that Bush is going to get another couple of yards to play with on all of those swing routes and dumps. Watch out for a much more productive season from Reggie...maybe he can buy Kim Kardashian a new set of heels with his bonus money he'll be making.
On top of that the Saints defense could not be much worse than last year.
Carolina Panthers - This is my surprise team of the season. There's talk that Jake's arm is better now than it was last year. They have one of the best one-two tandems in the league with Jonathan Stewart and DeAngelo Williams. Oh yeah, did I mention Mike Tyson is playing receiver for them?
Even though Steve Smith is out for the first couple of games, I think they can legitimately win 10 games. Their defense is very solid with Chris Gamble, Julian Peppers and a budding star in Jon Beason and I think, if they stay healthy, they can be a scary team to play. Watch out for the Teal and Black!
Tampa Bay Bucs - I'm so happy I'm not a Bucs fan. How painful would it be to year in and year out no your team is good enough to make the playoffs, but not good enough to win it all. Lame. Their defense is getting very old but is still very talented, their offense is much in the same. Expect an unimpressive under .500 season.
Atlanta Falcons - You have a rookie starting a quarterback, a decent defense and an explosive running back tandem. Who knows, this team could possibly win 8 or nine games, which means they could definitely top Tampa to not finish last depending on Matt Ryan.
I'll do playoff stuff later...I'm so pumped for tomorrow I don't know if I'll be able to sleep.
Solid Defenses and Shitty Quarterbacks...the NFC North
Jon Kitna, haha Kyle Orton, Tavaris Jackson and the unproven Aaron Rodgers...which one would you pick to lead your team to the super bowl? Hopefully you would represent yourself.
Although all of these teams have semi-crappy quarterbacks, they all have phenomenal defenses. Yes, I said Detroit has a phenomenal defense. At least talent wise they do, they have a minor problem keeping points off of the board.
Regardless of this gibber-jabber here's your NFC North:
Green Bay Packers -
This is a Ben Roethlisberger set-up...great defense, great running back, great receivers. Aaron Rodgers can legitimately complete 50 % of his passes and this team would still hit .500, they're that good.
The key for this team is, surprising to most, the health and performance of Ryan Grant. This guy was a huge surprise last year, enjoying on average, 100 yds and a TD per game. He's a shifty yet powerful running back who came up after a lackluster first half of the season by Deshaun Wynn. Watch out for him, if healthy (how do you like that handcuff) to have a really solid season.
The bottom line is that the O-Line is very solid, Nick Barnett, AJ Hawk, Al Harris and Charles Woodson lock up a VERY talented defense and they are going to walk into a ten win season.
Minnesota Vikings -
Yeah, everyone is choosing Minnesota to win the division, rock through the playoffs and possibly go to the Super Bowl. Screw them. HOW are you expecting a team with a leader by the name of Tavaris Jackson to take a team to the super bowl? Great question Greg...
I seem to recognize a similar plot a few years ago with a young, first year quarterback by the name of Marlon Briscoe...that didn't turn out well.
Minnesota's defense is arguably the best defense in the league, with a FILTHY D-Line and a pretty solid linebackers and turnover happy corner backs.
Adrian Peterson (aka Purple Jesus, All-Day, over-hyped fantasy RB) is the man. What else do I need to say about a man who TWICE ran for 225 yards or more and three TD's. Get out of here...that's insane once, but twice? I might be the only person who thinks Peterson might top his performance last year in terms of yards and TDs. Why you ask? Mainly because of the upcoming clip...the man runs like his life is on the line.
I have to get out of here because there's a hurricane coming up the coast and I have to drive to my parents house so I'm going to make this quick...
Chicago Bears -
The team is much better off with Kyle Orton, their defense is still top notch. I see them anywhere from 10 wins to 6 wins...very possible that Detroit passes them for third. Oh how the mighty have fallen.
Detroit Lions -
Jon Kitna is on pace to break in to the top ten ALL-TIME quarterbacks in passing yardage, thanks Mike Martz, you ruined our record books. Kitna still sucks, but he has a decent team around him: Calvin Johnson, Roy Williams, Kevin Smith, Rudi Johnson (yes he will have an impact)...sounds like a good group of skill players.
Look for Calvin Johnson to get hurt again and piss and moan himself to a similar season to last year.
Although all of these teams have semi-crappy quarterbacks, they all have phenomenal defenses. Yes, I said Detroit has a phenomenal defense. At least talent wise they do, they have a minor problem keeping points off of the board.
Regardless of this gibber-jabber here's your NFC North:
Green Bay Packers -
This is a Ben Roethlisberger set-up...great defense, great running back, great receivers. Aaron Rodgers can legitimately complete 50 % of his passes and this team would still hit .500, they're that good.
The key for this team is, surprising to most, the health and performance of Ryan Grant. This guy was a huge surprise last year, enjoying on average, 100 yds and a TD per game. He's a shifty yet powerful running back who came up after a lackluster first half of the season by Deshaun Wynn. Watch out for him, if healthy (how do you like that handcuff) to have a really solid season.
The bottom line is that the O-Line is very solid, Nick Barnett, AJ Hawk, Al Harris and Charles Woodson lock up a VERY talented defense and they are going to walk into a ten win season.
Minnesota Vikings -
Yeah, everyone is choosing Minnesota to win the division, rock through the playoffs and possibly go to the Super Bowl. Screw them. HOW are you expecting a team with a leader by the name of Tavaris Jackson to take a team to the super bowl? Great question Greg...
I seem to recognize a similar plot a few years ago with a young, first year quarterback by the name of Marlon Briscoe...that didn't turn out well.
Minnesota's defense is arguably the best defense in the league, with a FILTHY D-Line and a pretty solid linebackers and turnover happy corner backs.
Adrian Peterson (aka Purple Jesus, All-Day, over-hyped fantasy RB) is the man. What else do I need to say about a man who TWICE ran for 225 yards or more and three TD's. Get out of here...that's insane once, but twice? I might be the only person who thinks Peterson might top his performance last year in terms of yards and TDs. Why you ask? Mainly because of the upcoming clip...the man runs like his life is on the line.
I have to get out of here because there's a hurricane coming up the coast and I have to drive to my parents house so I'm going to make this quick...
Chicago Bears -
The team is much better off with Kyle Orton, their defense is still top notch. I see them anywhere from 10 wins to 6 wins...very possible that Detroit passes them for third. Oh how the mighty have fallen.
Detroit Lions -
Jon Kitna is on pace to break in to the top ten ALL-TIME quarterbacks in passing yardage, thanks Mike Martz, you ruined our record books. Kitna still sucks, but he has a decent team around him: Calvin Johnson, Roy Williams, Kevin Smith, Rudi Johnson (yes he will have an impact)...sounds like a good group of skill players.
Look for Calvin Johnson to get hurt again and piss and moan himself to a similar season to last year.
Friday, September 5, 2008
What's so funny Republicans?
Steven Colbert did a hilarious / powerful sketch against the Republicans last night on his show. He did a great job basically making Rudi Giuliani look like the biggest asshole in the state of Minnesota. (Who as we all know is basically in office because he happened to be the Mayor of New York during 9/11...)
Just watch, it happens at 1:30
Let me get on my high horse for thirty seconds...
Obviously Colbert spins it in a way that makes it humorous to us all, but this has got to be one of the more embarrassing things I have ever seen at a convention.
Rudi basically mocked the American Dream. Laughing in the face of people who actually make a difference in communities. People who work in the tough areas, meet the people who need the most help and give them their hand to help them up.
I'm not telling you how to vote.
All I'm saying is, that was embarrassing; both to Rudi and the Republican Party as a whole.
Just watch, it happens at 1:30
Let me get on my high horse for thirty seconds...
Obviously Colbert spins it in a way that makes it humorous to us all, but this has got to be one of the more embarrassing things I have ever seen at a convention.
Rudi basically mocked the American Dream. Laughing in the face of people who actually make a difference in communities. People who work in the tough areas, meet the people who need the most help and give them their hand to help them up.
I'm not telling you how to vote.
All I'm saying is, that was embarrassing; both to Rudi and the Republican Party as a whole.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
On with the the NFC....East SIIIIIIIIDE
I really just didn't want to start this because it's going to take longer to do all of these divisions. Each of them are so much harder to distinguish than the AFC. Almost every division is up for grabs, no joke. With that being said, let's start with the most potent division...the NFC East
Dallas Cowboys -
I better get mad credit for being legit and saying that pound for pound the Cowboys have a more talented team than the Eagles. Being from Philly, that's going to get me a nice Rita's water ice to the dome, but hey, we have to be fair.
The fact is, the Cowboys are STACKED offensively. Barring some major turn of events, the Cowboys could easily average over 30 points a game. Yes, their defense, although sketchy, can hold off that many points from opponents.
That being said, possible setbacks:
- T.O. gets hurt...the backup WR's are a JOKE. Well they're all a joke besides Patrick Crayton, who is a bonafide #2 in my book (which is probably more generous than most). Even if they weren't a joke, they are all, I repeat ALL, injured.
Sam Hurd, Miles Austin and Isaiah Stanback all haven't practiced in over a month from numerous separate instances. Which is half the reason I was SHOCKED that the Cowboys didn't wet the bed when Ashley Lelie was released, let alone any other WR's with half a down of experience.
- A Carrie Underwood vs. Jessica Simpson cat fight emerges and pushes Romo's mind away from football and towards thinking twice about his sexuality. In which case, this shirt I frequently rock while playing beer pong (picture above to the right) before baseball games will be nearly four times as funny...
- T.O. starts crying at every press conference over the media attacking his recently sexually confused quarterback, decides he's done with football and marries Dennis Rodman in California.
Obviously this is a little ridiculous, but being an Eagles fan, and a former fan of T.O. it's completely feasible. (That picture to the right is my first shot at Adobe Photoshop, I think a whole world of hilarity has just opened up)
T.O. is borderline insane and he's the essence of emotional instability. For god sakes he tried to commit suicide (apparently) on pills no more than a year ago, he cries at press conferences and is vocal about anything that is going through his mind. Dallas should feel privaleged that this nut job hasn't shit the bed in Dallas yet. I'd be amazed if something awkward through their team being in the spotlight so much doesn't distract the team and give this division to the Eagles.
- Emmitt Smith or Michael Irvin visit the team and give a speech to pump up the Cowboys. Emmitt Smith might be one fo the worst public speakers in the history of...um....public speaking. Can you imagine how your team would perform if they heard this gibberish before a game?
The only reason that Michael Irvin's speech would throw the team for a loop is that it would revolve around a kilo of white powder. Other than that, I find him inspiring.
Philadelphia Eagles -
Ahh my birds, such a disappointment every year. It's like freakin' clockwork: Eagles start off hot, McNabb gets hurt, backup QB takes us to a wild card birth, we lose in the first round - or - Start off hot, win division, make it to NFC championship, we lose - or - we win, and then lose to the Pats.
Regardless of history, you have to admit this team looks good. Brian Westbrook is arguably the best running back in the NFL, McNabb is a top five QB when he is healthy (no one can argue that) and the Eagles defense is improved over last year (Lito Sheppard is a back up DB, ridiculous).
The only main weakness of this team is WR. It has been for five years and it will be again this year. Our #1 WR Kevin Curtis had hernia surgery (a #2 or #3 on any other team) and could be out for up to four weeks. Reggie Brown has a touchy hamstring, so who knows what his deal is. The major bright spot, and possibly big fantasy pick up, has been Desean Jackson. He's an automatic HR threat from the return spot, Andy Reid is smitten with him like a warm apple fritter and he's apparently ready to be a big time threat. In case you haven't seen him in the preseason, here are some clips. HE'S LIKE SPIT ON A GRIDDLE BABY!
New York G-Men -
Dallas Cowboys -
I better get mad credit for being legit and saying that pound for pound the Cowboys have a more talented team than the Eagles. Being from Philly, that's going to get me a nice Rita's water ice to the dome, but hey, we have to be fair.
The fact is, the Cowboys are STACKED offensively. Barring some major turn of events, the Cowboys could easily average over 30 points a game. Yes, their defense, although sketchy, can hold off that many points from opponents.
That being said, possible setbacks:
- T.O. gets hurt...the backup WR's are a JOKE. Well they're all a joke besides Patrick Crayton, who is a bonafide #2 in my book (which is probably more generous than most). Even if they weren't a joke, they are all, I repeat ALL, injured.
Sam Hurd, Miles Austin and Isaiah Stanback all haven't practiced in over a month from numerous separate instances. Which is half the reason I was SHOCKED that the Cowboys didn't wet the bed when Ashley Lelie was released, let alone any other WR's with half a down of experience.
- A Carrie Underwood vs. Jessica Simpson cat fight emerges and pushes Romo's mind away from football and towards thinking twice about his sexuality. In which case, this shirt I frequently rock while playing beer pong (picture above to the right) before baseball games will be nearly four times as funny...
- T.O. starts crying at every press conference over the media attacking his recently sexually confused quarterback, decides he's done with football and marries Dennis Rodman in California.
Obviously this is a little ridiculous, but being an Eagles fan, and a former fan of T.O. it's completely feasible. (That picture to the right is my first shot at Adobe Photoshop, I think a whole world of hilarity has just opened up)
T.O. is borderline insane and he's the essence of emotional instability. For god sakes he tried to commit suicide (apparently) on pills no more than a year ago, he cries at press conferences and is vocal about anything that is going through his mind. Dallas should feel privaleged that this nut job hasn't shit the bed in Dallas yet. I'd be amazed if something awkward through their team being in the spotlight so much doesn't distract the team and give this division to the Eagles.
- Emmitt Smith or Michael Irvin visit the team and give a speech to pump up the Cowboys. Emmitt Smith might be one fo the worst public speakers in the history of...um....public speaking. Can you imagine how your team would perform if they heard this gibberish before a game?
The only reason that Michael Irvin's speech would throw the team for a loop is that it would revolve around a kilo of white powder. Other than that, I find him inspiring.
Philadelphia Eagles -
Ahh my birds, such a disappointment every year. It's like freakin' clockwork: Eagles start off hot, McNabb gets hurt, backup QB takes us to a wild card birth, we lose in the first round - or - Start off hot, win division, make it to NFC championship, we lose - or - we win, and then lose to the Pats.
Regardless of history, you have to admit this team looks good. Brian Westbrook is arguably the best running back in the NFL, McNabb is a top five QB when he is healthy (no one can argue that) and the Eagles defense is improved over last year (Lito Sheppard is a back up DB, ridiculous).
The only main weakness of this team is WR. It has been for five years and it will be again this year. Our #1 WR Kevin Curtis had hernia surgery (a #2 or #3 on any other team) and could be out for up to four weeks. Reggie Brown has a touchy hamstring, so who knows what his deal is. The major bright spot, and possibly big fantasy pick up, has been Desean Jackson. He's an automatic HR threat from the return spot, Andy Reid is smitten with him like a warm apple fritter and he's apparently ready to be a big time threat. In case you haven't seen him in the preseason, here are some clips. HE'S LIKE SPIT ON A GRIDDLE BABY!
New York G-Men -
How about this respect for the defending Super Bowl Champions? Win it all one year, and picked third in their division the next year by the NFL Nostradaumus himself, Mr. Greg Iversen.
How can I possibly pick them to be third. Hmmmm, let's see...they lost 23 sacks from last year, they're playing in a conference where every team has made major upgrades on defense (Jason Taylor, Pacman, Asante Samuel), and they lost Shockey. That, my friend is why they are going to be in third. Plus, they just hit the playoffs on a hot streak and rode it out to a championship.
Eli Manning is going to be there big winner this year. I see him improving a lot over last year, and could possibly make a jump to the top ten QB threshold at season's end.
Washington Redskins -
Ah, those pesky Redskins. They always steal a few from everyone in the division, but they are never good enough to steal more than that. Their whole season pretty much rides on the healthy/unhealthy shoulders of their running back. Portis plays well, they win, Portis plays bad, they lose. It's really that simple
Key Player: Clinton Portis
aka Dolemite Jenkins:
aka Choo Choo
aka Jerome from Southeast DC, Dr. "I Don't Know", aka get the hell off
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
My Thoughts On This Weekend...
God bless football season. Is it just me or is September the best month of the year? You are still on the high from Labor Day Weekend, college football season starts that weekend, NFL the next, last month of baseball, leaves are going to start changing, weather is beautiful...gotta love it baby!
So, now that the sappy love story introduction is over, let's get down to business.
First order: Funny things that happened this week...
ACC is Embarrassed
Why is this funny, you may be asking yourself. Watch it again, he almost lands on the team and basically takes out the coaches in the middle of the field.
That's because the ACC apparently can't tell the difference between Tar Heel Blue and Duke Blue. This parachute guy was supposed to deliver the game ball to the North Carolina game but apparently couldn't tell the difference on his way down and arrived at the wrong stadium. This obviously affected the Tar Heels as they had to pull off a 4th quarter comeback to beat McNeese State.
The ACC however is not embarrassed because it's 81st Airborne division landed in Italy instead of France. They had an incredibly unimpressive week. Their 7-4 week is deceiving, the wins include: a seven point win by Maryland over Delaware (who just lost their, now starting in the NFL, QB), a 52-7 victory over Charleston Southern, the above 8 pt. victory over McNeese St. at home and a Boston College team putting together a lackluster 21-0 win over Kent St.
Meanwhile, their three powerhouses all got the snot kicked out of them. Clemson lost 34-10 to Alabama, Virginia got DESTROYED by USC 52-7 (it seemed much worse than the score), and Virginia Tech lost to Eastern Carolina (who just lost it's #1 RB to the Titans). Wow, they better hope they turn this ship around.
Nick Saban Loves Being Back in the NCAA
Saban looks like an a**hole in this clip, but he jokes with them in the end and ends up coming off as a serious coach. I love his attitude, but his team is lacking in the talent pool. look for this team to be just over .500 down there in the SEC. Which also speaks volumes about the ACC...and how much it sucks.
Big Ten Impressive, Lose Best Player
7-3 is comparable to the ACC's record, yes. But the teams they were playing, completely different. The three losses were all to good teams: Michigan (in their first year of the new offense) let the game go in the second half and lost to an underrated Utah team, Michigan St. lost on an 81-yd TD scamper in the last minutes to lose to Cal, and Illinois looked REALLY good against a team that is expected to win the Big 12 in Missouri. Meanwhile, the other teams beat the snot out of their warm up teams by a combined 285 -80.
Damn right you felt a pop. You took one step and couldn't even put weight on it. This is WAY more serious than people think, I think he's going to be out for five to six weeks at least. If this kid comes back for the USC game he is A) going to be on a TON of cortisone and B) the biggest bad-ass east of the Mississippi. This is not good for the Buckeyes, they are still one of the better teams in the country...but this hurts, a lot.
UCLA Looks Impressive
This team beat a legit title contender with a QB who threw 4 int's...IN THE FIRST HALF. WHAT THE F*&^! Either everyone in America considerably over-rated Tennessee (which I doubt) or UCLA's defense is unreal. UT blew it to be honest. They couldn't get any sort of passing rhythm going and UCLA stacked the box to slow their running attack.
Things going against UCLA:
Craft's first game
Craft's 4 int's in the first half
Norm Chow's first game as Offensive coordinator
1st string TE injured in first quarter, out for game
1st string running back injured in 1st quarter, out first half
Somehow they pulled it off in the Rose Bowl...well done UCLA. It's a good start to the season, let's see how you do the rest of the way.
Only running for 29 yards the ENTIRE game
So, now that the sappy love story introduction is over, let's get down to business.
First order: Funny things that happened this week...
ACC is Embarrassed
Why is this funny, you may be asking yourself. Watch it again, he almost lands on the team and basically takes out the coaches in the middle of the field.
That's because the ACC apparently can't tell the difference between Tar Heel Blue and Duke Blue. This parachute guy was supposed to deliver the game ball to the North Carolina game but apparently couldn't tell the difference on his way down and arrived at the wrong stadium. This obviously affected the Tar Heels as they had to pull off a 4th quarter comeback to beat McNeese State.
The ACC however is not embarrassed because it's 81st Airborne division landed in Italy instead of France. They had an incredibly unimpressive week. Their 7-4 week is deceiving, the wins include: a seven point win by Maryland over Delaware (who just lost their, now starting in the NFL, QB), a 52-7 victory over Charleston Southern, the above 8 pt. victory over McNeese St. at home and a Boston College team putting together a lackluster 21-0 win over Kent St.
Meanwhile, their three powerhouses all got the snot kicked out of them. Clemson lost 34-10 to Alabama, Virginia got DESTROYED by USC 52-7 (it seemed much worse than the score), and Virginia Tech lost to Eastern Carolina (who just lost it's #1 RB to the Titans). Wow, they better hope they turn this ship around.
Nick Saban Loves Being Back in the NCAA
Saban looks like an a**hole in this clip, but he jokes with them in the end and ends up coming off as a serious coach. I love his attitude, but his team is lacking in the talent pool. look for this team to be just over .500 down there in the SEC. Which also speaks volumes about the ACC...and how much it sucks.
Big Ten Impressive, Lose Best Player
7-3 is comparable to the ACC's record, yes. But the teams they were playing, completely different. The three losses were all to good teams: Michigan (in their first year of the new offense) let the game go in the second half and lost to an underrated Utah team, Michigan St. lost on an 81-yd TD scamper in the last minutes to lose to Cal, and Illinois looked REALLY good against a team that is expected to win the Big 12 in Missouri. Meanwhile, the other teams beat the snot out of their warm up teams by a combined 285 -80.
Damn right you felt a pop. You took one step and couldn't even put weight on it. This is WAY more serious than people think, I think he's going to be out for five to six weeks at least. If this kid comes back for the USC game he is A) going to be on a TON of cortisone and B) the biggest bad-ass east of the Mississippi. This is not good for the Buckeyes, they are still one of the better teams in the country...but this hurts, a lot.
UCLA Looks Impressive
This team beat a legit title contender with a QB who threw 4 int's...IN THE FIRST HALF. WHAT THE F*&^! Either everyone in America considerably over-rated Tennessee (which I doubt) or UCLA's defense is unreal. UT blew it to be honest. They couldn't get any sort of passing rhythm going and UCLA stacked the box to slow their running attack.
Things going against UCLA:
Craft's first game
Craft's 4 int's in the first half
Norm Chow's first game as Offensive coordinator
1st string TE injured in first quarter, out for game
1st string running back injured in 1st quarter, out first half
Somehow they pulled it off in the Rose Bowl...well done UCLA. It's a good start to the season, let's see how you do the rest of the way.
Only running for 29 yards the ENTIRE game
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